“People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.”

Husband got shocked while reading his wife’s school report card…

I love sleeping, but I never want to go to sleep early…. We stay up late every night, regret it every morning, then do it all over again.

When i joke they take it seriously. When i’m serious they take it as a joke.

Yes Officer, I Did See The “Speed Limit” Sign, I Just Didn’t See You.

Teacher: How old is your mother?

Him: “I was a fool when I married you.” Her: “I know, but I was in love and didn’t notice.”