Him: “I was a fool when I married you.” Her: “I know, but I was in love and didn’t notice.”

Behind every angry woman stands a man who has absolutely no idea what he did wrong!

Wife got stung by a bee on the forehead. She’s at the doctor’s now, her face all swollen and bruised, she almost died. Husband! Luckily I was close enough to hit the bee with my shovel.

Husband got shocked while reading his wife’s school report card…

The best teacher in the world is that friend who teaches you everything 20 minutes before an exam.

Sometimes my brain is like the Bermuda Triangle. Information goes in and then it’s never found again.