“People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.”

Teacher: How old is your mother?

Teacher: What happened in 1809? Student: Abraham Lincoln was born.

If a dentist makes money off people with bad teeth, why would I use toothpaste that 4 out of 5 dentists recommend?

Son: Dad, why doesn’t the law allow us to marry more than once?

Yes Officer, I Did See The “Speed Limit” Sign, I Just Didn’t See You.

When i joke they take it seriously. When i’m serious they take it as a joke.