A motorist was mailed a picture of his car speeding through an automated radar…

Wife: It’s my bad luck that I married you. Otherwise, a lot of smart men were interested in me.

Teacher: Can you define who is lecturer?

Wife got stung by a bee on the forehead. She’s at the doctor’s now, her face all swollen and bruised, she almost died. Husband! Luckily I was close enough to hit the bee with my shovel.

When a Girl Says ‘What?’ It’s not because she didn’t hear you, She’s just giving you chance to change what you said.

Him: “I was a fool when I married you.” Her: “I know, but I was in love and didn’t notice.”